COVID-19 Lockdown, Day 102

Today was very productive. I took a walk in the park even though it was hot, and I read from the Rule of St. Benedict. I read the chapter about the 12 steps to humility. So much is involved with this. Click here to learn them in detail. What struck me most, especially with all that is transpiring, is making myself inferior to all. In that same light, I am expected to be obedient even in the face of injustice. Maybe I am not reading that correctly. I know that I am to offer the other cheek when one is struck, but I only have two cheeks. Surely I am not expected to deny my humanity too, for the sake of humility. 

When I came home, I saw that the Reverend Father wrote back. He said that he received my messages and will get back to me once he could compose a "comprehensive response." People of faith, please pray that he will allow my period of discernment to begin very soon. 

Later today, I met with my Bible study group, and I gave them the news: I plan to transfer to another congregation. I explained my reasons, such as the ungodly behavior directed towards me and others by people of influence in the congregation, and how I have lost face and have found it unhealthy for me to continue worshiping there. They were very understanding and empathetic. I feel guilty about leaving the good people of the congregation, like my group and She-Sits-by-the-Fire. I feel as if I am letting them down. Still, I will not be happy there. Things are just too cruel and corrupt there. I have reached a point in my life where I must cut all cancerous relationships from my life in order to be sane. If this means I must find new churches every few years, so be it. I try very hard to be a gentleman, and a gentleman knows when to leave. 

--Signing off.  

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