My Daily Struggle in the COVID-19 Lockdown

This has been a reflective day for me. I was able to meditate more. I also talked to the Reverend Father about issues I have been having. It has been a while since I have been able to sit and talk with a clergyman about my problems and experiences. He assured me that we all feel trapped eventually, which is how I have been feeling--partly the reason why I have quadragentaphobia (Yes, it's a word; look it up). He explained quite a bit to me. He told me about trans-reason analysis. By this, if I an trapped in a proverbial box where nothing makes sense, rise out of the box to analyze other boxes to get the big picture. He taught me about how to look for resolutions when there are no solutions in sight, and that finding a resolution is a shared task between me and anyone who shares the problem or is affected by it. He also talked about what dead churches look like and the characteristics of those who don't care that their church is dying.He acknowledged that there are those who m...

First full, and long, day at the monastery. Since I had gotten in late last night, I didn't get up on time for Matins (or Vigils), which is at 5:10 AM, but I did make it for Lauds, Terce, Holy Eucharist, Sext, None, Vespers, and Compline. Very beautiful and simplistic simple chanting. Almost as cleansing as the Missionary Baptist call to worship chant (aka I Love the Lord; He Heard My Cry). The food isn't the best so far (for a picky eater like me), but I was prepared for this. Besides, the food was the least of my motivation to come. There are three monks here, with two "fathers," including Father John Cochran, the Father Superior. A "father" is simply an ordained pastor who is also a monk. There is also a postulant who is an immigrant from Korea. There were also 3 Lay Benedictines who are residents here, and a father and a son who are visitors. I have been invited by the Reverend Father to become a Lay Benedictine. As I almost consider myself an independ...