My Daily Struggle in the COVID-19 Lockdown

So, I went to church today at the local Greek Orthodox church as I said I would. I love the liturgy and all of the icons in the sanctuary. Plus, I am a sucker for domes. Plus, the priest was very nice; since the only Greek I know is "Kyrie eleison," "Chrystos anesti," "Alithos anesti," and "S'agapo,"  he showed me a website I could use to follow along to the liturgy, called "Ages Initiative." It helped me quite a bit, but learning Greek would help me better. For that, I would need to learn a new alphabet. Even so, I love the chanting, the incense, and the blessed bread (not Eucharist) concluding the service. In fact, I saw something spectacular today. When the priest burned incense all over the altar area, which was behind a wall called an iconostasis (like the curtain to the Most Holy Place), the incense made a fog above the altar. When it streamed through the iconostasis, the sun hit it as it spread out and landed on all of our he...

My birthday is almost over. I made it to 40, and now I am thinking more of how to prepare for the future. In addition to being an oblate, I am planning to be more or less debt free in a year, give or take. I pray that I get not more unfortunate surprises. There is one thing that I have not had in years that I desperate desire is financial security--to be able to have something to fall back on in case of an emergency.  I also pray for emotional security. In that prayer, I will continue to remove cancerous influences from my life, whether they are habits, people, groups, or anything that makes me irresolutely unhappy and less sane. Reversely, I plan to find positive influences where I can keep my inner peace and be of use. That is what I hope to gain from whatever church I choose. I have very little tolerance for churches that do little to nothing but socialize and argue, as well as those where people who do the least complain the most and wear down those who are trying really hard. ...

Today was very productive. I took a walk in the park even though it was hot, and I read from the Rule of St. Benedict. I read the chapter about the 12 steps to humility. So much is involved with this. Click here to learn them in detail.  What struck me most, especially with all that is transpiring, is making myself inferior to all. In that same light, I am expected to be obedient even in the face of injustice. Maybe I am not reading that correctly. I know that I am to offer the other cheek when one is struck, but I only have two cheeks. Surely I am not expected to deny my humanity too, for the sake of humility.  When I came home, I saw that the Reverend Father wrote back. He said that he received my messages and will get back to me once he could compose a "comprehensive response." People of faith, please pray that he will allow my period of discernment to begin very soon.  Later today, I met with my Bible study group, and I gave them the news: I plan to transfer to...

One hundred days. I have been doing this blog for 100 days, or 3 1/3 months, every day, non-stop. These days have certainly not been uneventful. There have been the closure of businesses, people not respecting restrictions, politicians and others abusing the restrictions, a great surge in cases, rampant death, missing church, a church being burned down for challenging the local government, a Black man being murdered by a police officer in broad daylight, protests, riots, destruction of monuments, the skin color of looters and arsonists, returning to church under social distancing, and then discrimination by possible churchians. Then, there have been my aunt's death, issues at work, my quadragintaphobia, and my visit to the monastery. We started with Phase 1, the growth of COVID-19, Phase 2, the most lethal stage, which is where everything non-essential was closed and there was an increase in unemployment, thereby necessitating the need for stimulus checks, and where so many peopl...

Today was very sultry! Fortunately, I was able to spend most of the time indoors. When I got up this morning, after taking care of an unpleasant errand, I went to Panera Bread and did some writing on my book. I was able to get much accomplished since I had gotten many messages and texts. I received two comments about my post from yesterday. One person told me to "judge not, lest ye be judged, " and another accused me of gossiping and being one-sided. First the former comment. So many people, young and old, conservative and liberal, misquote that passage from the Gospel of John, seventh chapter. They do this to keep people from confronting them about their sins and because they are not interested in changing. Many will use their legal protected classes statuses for this, and many will use their youth or old age. People get tired of this from others. Those who are protected eventually are targeted, and while recalcitrant children eventually get the rod, elderly "good old...

Today was an okay day. I had a meeting at church with a few anonymous members of the congregation about why a comrade and I were resigning as elders of the church I currently attend. Well, let's just say that it was almost exactly how I anticipated. Let's just say that there was behavior of some Christians that was not very Christ-like. Let's just say that I received more reminders of how age and maturity are not always parallel. Let's just say that this particular congregation, as a few of them keep drilling holes in a sinking ship, has only a about 2-3 years, tops, before they shut their doors. Let's just say that people like those I have mentioned are part of the reason why churches close and their children and grandchildren abandon the faith. Hence, let's just say, or rather sing, the following parody: You treat people like roaches, you treat people like tools You treat people like roaches, you treat people like tools And you think you're the Savi...

Made it to the monastery! The train was an hour late in arriving because they were having brake problems long after we left Union Station. So annoying; it seems as if I always have problems when I travel. The place is very nice--right in the middle of the forest. Very quiet too. The Father Superior is the one who picked me up at the station, clad in a brown cassock, cincture, and scapular with a hood. He even wore the traditional sandals. He told me the history of the only Lutheran monastery in America, and one of three in the world. I will take many pictures and post them--including of my room, which is twice the size I thought it would be. I would write more, but I need to get to bed. After all, matins are at 5:10 in the morning. --Signing off.