My Daily Struggle in the COVID-19 Lockdown

 So, this has been quite a week. It started with the news that The Wife to get tested for COVID-19 because someone very reckless manager let a client stay in a room where my wife was volunteering. Fortunately, she came back negative, which is good news for both of us. That is still wrong of him. With all the nonsense going on, you do not let a person complaining of COVID-19 symptoms stay with others. That is just wrong, inconsiderate, and dangerous. Shame on him! Next, for those who know me best, I suffer from depression, and I take medication for it. For a while, I was off of it because I did not want to be dependent on medication anymore. Plus, I don't like the side effects. For a while, I was off of the medication, but I noticed my depression was worsening, and I could only focus on how difficult my life has been: financial problems for the past 4 years, disrespect at work, the death of my aunt, COVID-19, my paternal grandma getting COVID-19 and my old man not telling me about i...

This has been a reflective day for me. I was able to meditate more. I also talked to the Reverend Father about issues I have been having. It has been a while since I have been able to sit and talk with a clergyman about my problems and experiences. He assured me that we all feel trapped eventually, which is how I have been feeling--partly the reason why I have quadragentaphobia (Yes, it's a word; look it up). He explained quite a bit to me. He told me about trans-reason analysis. By this, if I an trapped in a proverbial box where nothing makes sense, rise out of the box to analyze other boxes to get the big picture. He taught me about how to look for resolutions when there are no solutions in sight, and that finding a resolution is a shared task between me and anyone who shares the problem or is affected by it. He also talked about what dead churches look like and the characteristics of those who don't care that their church is dying.He acknowledged that there are those who m...