My Daily Struggle in the COVID-19 Lockdown

People had really gotten on my nerves this week. First, you have toilet matter masquerading as humans still attacking police officers who are just doing their jobs when they come to stop them from illegally destroying property, such as the Christopher Columbus statue Then Mayor Lighthead (you read me) ordered the overnight removal of the statue that police had injured themselves protecting to placate the samboes. (PS: read the last post to know what I am talking about.  Mind you, I don't like mass murderers like Columbus. It disgusts me that a halfway civilized society would have statues celebrating Columbus or General Sheridan. Regardless, she did not remove the statue because of how she felt about him. She did it for publicity. Now calls herself trying to defy the President when he threatened to send federal agents to Chicago to do the job she will not do: quell the riots and stop the shooting.  Ms. Mayor, more people are being shot this weekend like all weekends, and what a...

Black Lives Don’t Matter That caught you by horrid surprise Did it not? Do you think this is written By a murderous Klansman Or an ignorant Karen? No, I am a Black man A frustrated Black man A tired Black man A Black man who sees the hypocrisy Of all of the Black Lives Matter posters In the windows of houses and businesses Because of the lack of justice For dozens of Blacks Murdered by Klansmen in Blue Where the hell was your indignation On Friday and Saturday nights When hundreds of brothers, sisters And even babies Are shot to death By other brothers? Where was it When sisters place their millions Of unborn children On the altars of Margaret Sanger Who only wanted to see the Black nation Wither away and die? Where was it When hardworking Black brothers and sisters Watched the businesses they struggled to build Burned to the ground Because Black lives supposedly matter? What about Black police officers Who were br...

Another eventful week. First, America is seeing an increase in states turning into hotspots. Except for New York, these are states that did not take the pandemic seriously. So far, thankfully, this is not much of an issue in Illinois. We are still in Phase 4, which allows us to enjoy the summer provided we use social distancing (or, as The Wife calls it, "physical distancing"). In fact, we went to a restaurant for the first time in months yesterday! Another beacon of hope: scientists found a COVID-19 vaccine this week, and it passed its first test! Sure, nothing is final, but a glimmer of hope is still hope. We are closer to the end of this pandemic now than we were months ago. Rejoice! Now for some unpleasant news. The savage rioters are at it again. They have destroyed church statues, Confederate statues, and they are now going after Christopher Columbus statues--specifically, the one in Chicago's Grant Park. Personally, I despise Christopher Columbus, and I ...

I returned to work this week. The COVID-19 restrictions did not change. I missed two clients getting seriously ill however. Another one must self quarantine for two weeks because he visited a state with a resurgence of COVID-19. At least he is accepting of it. Another one said that he would refuse to honor the quarantine--as if he had a choice. It has been one week since I stopped attending my previous church. I turned in the key to the more decent member of the "ruling family." If I had to give it to the first person who asked for it, I would have sinned. The latter man has one of the worst attitudes I have ever seen in a church. He is disrespectful and domineering. Maybe he is trying to compensate for something he feels is missing, or maybe he needs surgery to remove the large bone from his head. At any rate, this good-old boy is one of the causes of a dying church. Such pettiness and phariseeism have no place in a church or any Christian group. It drives people away and...

My birthday is almost over. I made it to 40, and now I am thinking more of how to prepare for the future. In addition to being an oblate, I am planning to be more or less debt free in a year, give or take. I pray that I get not more unfortunate surprises. There is one thing that I have not had in years that I desperate desire is financial security--to be able to have something to fall back on in case of an emergency.  I also pray for emotional security. In that prayer, I will continue to remove cancerous influences from my life, whether they are habits, people, groups, or anything that makes me irresolutely unhappy and less sane. Reversely, I plan to find positive influences where I can keep my inner peace and be of use. That is what I hope to gain from whatever church I choose. I have very little tolerance for churches that do little to nothing but socialize and argue, as well as those where people who do the least complain the most and wear down those who are trying really hard. ...

Well, tomorrow, July 4th, is the big day. The day I turn, yes, 40. I plan to first, spend the morning walking and in prayer. I then will go to my mother's house for a cookout and maybe see fireworks later. And for those who do not know the story, I thought the fireworks were for me until I was 9 years old. There has been some talk in the African-American community about the 4th of July this year. I have heard some say to treat it like a regular day, some have said to wear black, and others are probably going to use this day to protest. In a way, I understand their concerns. Some are rooted in historical hypocrisies, and others insist that there are lessons America is too slow in learning. I remember the scene from Roots, in which Fiddler, Bell, and Kunta/Toby are in the kitchen talking about how the Americans won the War of Independence. When Bell marveled at how the local Whites had been celebrating and shouting about freedom being won, Fiddler, as a joke, replied, "Ain...

Today was very productive. I took a walk in the park even though it was hot, and I read from the Rule of St. Benedict. I read the chapter about the 12 steps to humility. So much is involved with this. Click here to learn them in detail.  What struck me most, especially with all that is transpiring, is making myself inferior to all. In that same light, I am expected to be obedient even in the face of injustice. Maybe I am not reading that correctly. I know that I am to offer the other cheek when one is struck, but I only have two cheeks. Surely I am not expected to deny my humanity too, for the sake of humility.  When I came home, I saw that the Reverend Father wrote back. He said that he received my messages and will get back to me once he could compose a "comprehensive response." People of faith, please pray that he will allow my period of discernment to begin very soon.  Later today, I met with my Bible study group, and I gave them the news: I plan to transfer to...

Thank you to the three who responded. After this week, I am going to write one post a week--on Saturdays. Hopefully by this, I will have a more even flow of material. I will continue this blog until we reach Phase 5, and then we can decide what my next blog should be about. I have read how some states that have relaxed restrictions too hastily are now starting to regret it as there is a second surge in infections that has arrived. So far, this has not touched Illinois due to our strict lockdown. New York, on the other hand, is also experiencing a second surge. Considering how congested it is, no wonder. Humans are not meant to live in such cities. Being crammed together does not help us to see humanity in a positive light. In fact, cities make us less than human in our attitudes and behaviors. That is why we are meant to live in small towns, villages, hamlets, and in the country. As for New York, I wonder if the protests caused the second surge, or if the sheer population limits thei...